Working Titlez

In times of economic challenge, turn to a professional marketer of legendary success for back-to-basics advice.

Guest Blogger Kristofer S. Kringle, CEO, North Pole Enterprises

Since I’ve been advertising my message of glad tidings and good cheer to my loyal worldwide customer base for some time now, I have a few proven techniques and tips you may wish to consider for the coming year.

1. Once you’ve got a solid positioning statement like my “Merry Christmas and Happy New Year:, stick with it as long as it works — a few centuries or so.
2. Select a snazzy color combination like red and green and use it liberally. Remember, repetitiveness builds retention.
3. A creative concept unique to your organization can fly a long, long time — just look at my reindeer and sleigh.
4. Home delivery is essential for service-based businesses. My chimney techniques are part of my claim-to-fame and unmatched by others (just ask the Tooth Fairy).
5. Dynamic packaging is everything. Everyone identifies my swell red stocking cap with me.
6. We live in a global economy. A multi-lingual jingle like my “Ho! Ho! Ho!” is understood everywhere.
7. Know your target audience and create appeals for each segment. Oldies relate to my wise bearded visage, while the young-uns know they can sit on my lap and share their dreams of things to come on Christmas morning.

When I was seven, I asked Santa Claus for a typewriter. A REAL typewriter, not a toy — on that point, I was very specific.

I remember feeling sure I needed a typewriter. I had no plan as to what I’d do with it. Oh, I’d “play secretary” and type letters or maybe write stories. Somehow, I had the notion, if I had a typewriter, that the words would just flow, unlike the laborious process of penciling block letters on lined newsprint or the faux-cursive I was experimenting with (real handwriting was not in the curriculum until the third grade).

My parents repeatedly asked me if a typewriter was what I REALLY wanted? I matter-of-factly assured them a typewriter was EXACTLY what I wanted and while Santa more commonly brought toys to good little boys and girls, I was confident he’d deliver on my request and was pretty sure I was on the “good” list.

Christmas morning, I awakened first. Tiptoeing down the hallway, my excitement bursting, I rounded the corner and there, under the tree, it sat. Atop its own black leather case was a REAL typewriter. Years later, I would learn that it was a military surplus training typewriter. The keys were different colors to teach learning typists which fingers to use. It also typed only capital letters. My dad paid $5 for it. He’d had quite a challenge finding an affordable real typewriter, just days before Christmas.

I sank to my knees and ran my fingers over the machine, holding my breath. A sheet of paper protruded. MERRY CHRISTMAS, CAROLYN. ENJOY YOUR TYPEWRITER. LOVE, SANTA. This was more than I could keep to myself. Rushing back down the hall, I shouted out, “Santa brought me a typewriter AND HE WROTE ME A LETTER!”

Later that morning, after presents had been opened, pictures taken and breakfast eaten, Mom showed me how to roll a fresh sheet in my beloved typewriter and I was ready to begin. I stared at the white sheet of paper. Frozen. I could not think of a single thing to type.

Writer’s block at seven.